When Rylie was about 18 months I began to totally freak out about the responsibility of raising her to know and love the Lord. I had no idea where to even begin. I knew it was more than just going to church and putting her in programs, it was my responsibility first and foremost to do this...not someone else's. This was weighing so heavy on my heart that I finally called my mentor friend Mary K and asked if she could come over to talk about it.
I was pregnant with Austyn at the time so the moment Mary K came in the door I started sobbing like my life was about to end. (What is it about pregnancy that turns you into such an idiot?) I finally managed to choke out what was bothering me. I'm sure Mary K wanted to laugh at my spectacular display of emotions but thank God she didn't....I also have a little thing called pregnancy rage. I told her I didn't know how to teach my children about Jesus and it was totally stressing me out. Should I be reading Rylie Bible stories from dusk till dawn, doing devotions at a certain time, praying with her 5 times a day....what does teaching about the Lord look like in a home setting?
This is basically what she said. That I was "putting way to much pressure on myself to make it look a certain way." She said that their family, which is in the ministry, rarely sits down and does devotions together. And it's ok. The world is not going to end if you don't make it happen. It's the day to day love for the Lord that you show your kids. It's the conversations, the answers to questions, how you react to situations. In short, showing and telling them how you love the Lord.
Mary K definitely helped me calm down about regimented Bible time, but her answer presented a new problem. I wasn't used to using the Lord in casual conversation and didn't know how I would answer my children's questions when they came up. This is the point when I began to really buckle down and work on myself first, because I realized I couldn't teach my kids what I didn't know myself. I really plugged into the Bible and started memorizing scripture. Maybe a year later my sister Ann told me about a book "Don't Make me Count to Three" by Ginger Plowman. It goes over how to discipline and train your children using God's word. This book showed me how to incorporate the scripture with day to day life. Now, a few years later I feel like I have a few (definitely not all) answers for my girls and am so much more confident talking about and showing my love for the Lord. I am so thankful the Holy Spirit was putting the pressure on me then when my girls were still young.
I still really love the idea of doing something as a family though. I would love to hear some of the traditions you have with your family or that you grew up with. Do you read the Bible as a family, do devotions, have prayer time....when? What does teaching about the Lord look like in your house?
4 comments:
Now that my kids are adults and I am able to step back and look at the whole idea of raising Christians, I have come to several conclusions. One of them that hurts the most is that Christians are not "raised." Rather God chooses His own and the Spirit draws them to Himself. I think many times (most of the time) I was more concerned with behavior rather than teaching my children how much God loves them. The more I learn about God and His plan of redemption the more I see that it is the Love of God that draws us. My tip would be let your children see God's love in action.
We read a devotional from "Keys for Kids" each night at supper with our children 5 and 8. They LOVE them and remind me when I forget. We also pray with each of our children at bedtime and before they leave for school as well as before meals.
One of the coolest things I've seen in my children is when they stop in the middle of a frustrating or difficult task and say aloud "Dear God, please give me patience to handle this." Wonder where they've heard this? :)
When stress is rising about even the smallest situations, my kids say "Mom, did you pray about it?" Um, yeah. Probably not. Sure glad I have my constant reminders around though.
It's a difficult job, but as long as you continue to seek that relationship with Him, Jesus will be apparent to your kids through you.
Tami,
When I was growing up Mom and Dad spent many hours reading Bible stories to us. As we got older and pulled in all directions by music, and sports, it became apparent that we wouldn't have as much time together reading stories, and spending time. Mom and Dad made it a priority that all of us showed up at the breakfast table at the same time. Even if that meant I had to get up at 6:00 in the morning to practice piano, we ate breakfast together and did devotions. Many times this was the only real time we spent together since Heidi and I were often at the school past 10 in the evenings between sports, musical rehearsals, choir practices, etc... We started the day with scripture and prayer as a family, what an awesome way to start a day! As smaller children we would also end the day in prayer at bedtimes with Mom and Dad. Even after I aged out of the chaparoned prayer, I made it an important part of my evening ritual. The other thing that I really liked was that we had different prayers for how old we were. There was a little song for when we were young (and then we would go into "bless mommy and daddy, and Heidi, and kitty...") and then as we got older we were taught more difficult prayers to memorize.
Thanks for your answers...I loved them all. It is so hard not to focus on behavior but what's in the heart. I love to see how others do things and how they were raised...what they liked and didn't like. I faintly remember something about keys for kids so I must've done that at one point in my life, gonna have to check into it again. I appreciate your input and ideas too!
Post a Comment