Interruption

Still reading A Woman after God's Own Heart. Still being convicted. Yesterday I was reading about time robbers. Things we do that are a waste of time. Here are some things the author listed:

- Procrastination

- Inadequate personal planning and scheduling

- Interruptions by people without appointments (this includes interruptions by way of the telephone. And please note, your children are not interruptions - they are your greatest work and the best investment of your time!)

- Failure to delegate

- Poor use of the telephone

- Reading junk mail

- Lack of concern for good time management

- Unclear priorities

There are a few things I don't wholly agree with here. Interruptions by people without appointments is just life and I welcome it...but I do realize there is a limit. Also, parenting is important, but my greatest work...not sure. However, I did come to a hard conclusion. I realized that I really do view my kids as an interruption in my life. They interrupted my life when they were born... my time with my husband and my time for myself was obliterated. They interrupt my phone conversations, well, all my conversations actually. They interrupt my thoughts, my dreams, my prayers. When they wake up early in the morning they interrupt my sleep. When they wake up early from naps I am irritated by the interruption of my free time. This obviously isn't a good way to view my kids.

It took me a good 3 years after Rylie was born to adjust to my new life. I kinda felt sorry for myself a lot. I hated how much having a child tied me down. All the sudden I couldn't do anything I used to do without a babysitter or dragging my girl with me. I missed having a job and feeling needed. I missed my old life....a lot. Still do sometimes. But, I've adjusted now. I do like staying home with my kids. I love them and have amazing moments with them. But, I realized I'm still in this mentality that my life was interrupted.

I find myself wishing for the school days and wanting to get on with my life. Someone once gave my friend great advice "just let life be what it is." Sounds simple, yet it's not easy at all. I just told some of my friends the other day that the main reason I don't want to have another baby is the interruption of my schedule. I can get up early have a little time before the girls wake up to workout and do devotions. If I had another baby this would be gone for at least a year. I love this time...I don't want another interruption. Sounds horrible when I put it that way though.

I'm gonna have to get a handle on this, but the jury's still out on baby #3.