Crap My Mom Says

I recently read an article about a show on TV called $#*! My Dad Says.  It was apparently made after a kid started posting crazy things on twitter that his dad said to him.  I've never watched the show but I got to thinking, hmmmm....I have one of these people in my life.  My mom.  She definitely says enough crazy things for me to out her on them.  Our version is probably a little more PG than the show's, but here are just a few instances where mom has given her two cents on certain subjects...

On Infertility

"Oh, I don't know what that's like, I got pregnant every time your dad threw his pants at the end of the bed."


On Comfort

"That bed was harder than a brickbat!" (No idea what this means)


On the Weather

"It's hotter than a sow out there." 

"It's colder than a well-diggers gizzard today."


On People who do Stupid Things

"Well the poor, dumb soul!" or "He ain't much for brains."


On Certain Foods

"Oh, I can't eat that - it bloats me up like a toad."


After dropping something or hurting herself

"Oh, balls!"  (Yes, balls)


On looks

"Yikes, that baby could stop a clock!"

She's not as innocent as she looks :). 

(Had to pick a picture from Winter because it just makes me feel cooler looking at it.)

Love you Mom!

Please do share if you have someone in your life that says something crazy, I can't ever get enough of crazy :).