Stayin' at Home

"So, what do you do for a living?"

I find answering this question to be kind of amusing, because I usually get one of three responses when I tell people I stay at home with my kids.

1.  "Ahhh, I see," some people will say with their eyebrows raised.  The subject is quickly changed and they do their best to mask their loss of respect, but I always catch it.

My quick translation of this response: what a waste.

2. "Good for you, that's what I did when I had little ones."  This response usually comes from the 60+ crowd.  I love this crowd, they know what I go through in a day and they respect me for it.  I get the feeling they don't often run into my kind anymore....

Translation: your job is important.

3. "I could never do that." This usually coming from working moms. Maybe they say this because they get a good dose of staying-at-home on their days off and think they couldn't do it full time or they just love their job and couldn't imagine quitting.  (If I would have had a job I adored, I guarantee I would still be working some and this would be my response.)


My translation: we are different people, but we could be friends :).


Occasionally I get a "oh, you're lucky, wish I could do that."  This response always makes me feel bad for not feeling more grateful that I can stay home.

So, I've told you what an idiot my brother is, well, he wrote this on my last birthday card:

"Tami, have a great birthday and don't work too hard.

No wait, you don't have a job so I'm sure you will be taking it easy. 

Have a great day." 

Love, Dan

Yes, he was trying to get a rise out of me.  And succeeded.  But, I really think this is what many people think when I tell them what I do for a living.  It's what I thought before I had kids.  Hmmm, how easy it all sounds, doesn't it?

Well, no matter what the response, I've finally embraced this as my job.

I'm here to tell you, I've never had a harder job.  It's the most mentally, spiritually, and physically draining job I've ever had.  And though it's not everyone's calling, it's something I feel the Lord calling me to do.  It definitely draws me nearer to him in desperation more than any other work I've done in my past!

I know I'm not the best at my line of work, in fact, I would definitely have 3 pink slips by now in corporate America.  And perhaps some jail time if thoughts could put you in there. I absolutely hated it when I first started my new stay-at-home role.  Imagine taking a totally selfish person and putting them in a selfless job. 

I was prideful. I felt insignificant - like I wasn't contributing to the world like I had been. 

I was lonely. At the time, none of my friends stayed home and I felt sorry for myself.

I was irritated.  My life as I knew it was taken away by someone who weighed 5 lbs and was super crabby at all times.

I felt this way for close to 3 years! Evidently it takes me a little longer to accept change than the average person....but I stuck with it and the Lord helped me get through that transition. I now love my job and can't imagine doing anything different. Every day is not a picnic by any means, but I feel very fortunate that I can stay home and be with my girls.  (...even if it does still feel somehow insignificant to write "stay-at-home mom" on forms I have to fill out that ask for my occupation.)

And as I sent that 5 lb. baby to Kindergarten this year, I realized how fast it really does go and how blessed I am to witness it.

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This week's verse:

O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts where there is no water.

Psalm 63:1

Birthdays and Boys

Yesterday Eric turned 33.  The girls insisted that he needed a jayhawk cake.  I tried to talk them into cupcakes. Not because he's not worth making a jayhawk cake for, but more because I haven't slept in weeks and knew my patience and energy level wasn't where it needed to be to decorate a cake with the girls.  I had to weigh the cost/benefit ratio. 

Cost = the girls' very lives  

vs. 

Benefit =  the girls' excitement over making something for dad

But, in the end the excitement level was just too high for me to refuse them.

So we made a jayhawk cake. I'm not sure it was all that identifiable, it could have been mistaken for a cardinal or angry bird.  However, I kept my cool and the girls were happy, so it was worth the risk. 

So tell me....why is it that 33 sounds good on a man, but the thought of myself turning 33 in a few months makes me want to curl up in a ball and cry?  Okay, everything makes me want to cry right now, but you know what I mean?

When I think about aging, I think about more wrinkles, more cellulite, less attractiveness, being known as middle aged or "a mom" instead of a girl.....

But when I think about Eric aging I think, "hmmm...he'll be handsome at 40." 

Guys only get more distinguished and attractive.  Gray hair even looks good on them.  Birthdays are no big deal for them.  Good grief, boys have it all, don't they?

But, I have no complaints about getting to grow older alongside this one.

Happy Birthday Eric!

Knitting 102 - Don't Stop Believin'

Well, it's been over a year since I first picked up the knitting "sticks" as I like to say.  In case you were holding your breath, things have gotten much better since taking knitting 101. I can actually make a few things now. And they turn out!  I mean, I've had a few fiasco's and given some knitted things as gifts that I really shouldn't have...but at this point I would give myself a "B" for effort.

After posting about my disastrous knitting 101 course, Carisa took pity on my friend Natalie and me, gave us some cool patterns and got us started down the right path. She was officially our saving grace and affectionately known as our Knitting 102 course. 

Here are a few of my projects over the last couple months:

A newborn hat for my hairdresser who's soon having her first baby.

I had a request for a "hat with braids" from my girly girl

Guess who else wanted one?

a birthday present for Blake

Baby pod for my sister's friend - love this yarn combo if you can't tell!

Brim hat for my sister Amber - she totally rocks it!

Pod and hat for my friend Jen's precious baby Kyle

Boy brim for my main man Graham

You'll be happy to know that I can now knit and talk to my husband at the same time.  Isn't life beautiful?

So, moral of the story is...if you want to try something new.  Do it.  Then write about how pathetic you are at it and pray someone wonderful takes you under their wing.

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This Week's Verse:

To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples.  Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

John 8:31-32

My Testimony

A few years ago in a Bible study I was involved in, we were challenged to write our testimony down on paper. I decided it was a worthwhile project because someday I want my kids to read it and know how my life as a follower of Jesus began.  I wrote it out, saved it to my computer, put one in my Bible and one in my safe deposit box (so in the event of death there would be no questions about my salvation).  One can never be too prepared. Although I sure hope people don't need to read it to know where I'm going when I die.

I tried to make it as interesting as I could, but couldn't help feeling a little disappointed that there was not much to tell.  No major event that led me to Christ.  No bad past erased, no "coming to Jesus" moment, no hell-fire and brimstone sermon that turned my life around.  I remember the moment of asking Jesus to be my Savior but honestly couldn't recall a time when I never trusted him as my Savior.  I grew up knowing Christ and trusting in him.

I trusted in Him and prayed for the big and little things in life.  To please help me find my lost shoe, help me pass my tests, find the man of my dreams, get that job....he was just simply part of my life.  My maturity in Him has grown much and keeps growing - but my relationship, it began long ago.

Until yesterday, I kind of looked at my testimony as a "boring" one.  But, this sermon opened my eyes to something.  The pastor said,

"we {his church} have those who are saved in the earliest point of their life, they don't ever remember not loving trusting and following Jesus Christ and the weird thing for me is that people don't like that testimony, you should LOVE that testimony.  Like I am begging God that my kid's testimony isn't that he was shooting heroin in his eyeballs then ended up in prison but rather that he has a testimony that says 'I don't remember a day that I didn't love trust and follow Him.'  And so you shouldn't be ashamed of your testimony you should love and delight in it if that's your testimony."

And so I do, from now on...what's boring about loving Christ your whole life?

So here's my amazing testimony (written on 1/3/2008):

My Testimony

I will never forget the way I felt that night – the night I gave my life to the Lord.  I don’t remember my age (though I’m guessing around eight), I don’t remember the message or activities at AWANA, I don’t remember who was there (except for my mom).  What I do recall is the single most important decision in my life made at such a young age. 

I was riding in the back of our white family station wagon – which later became known as the “party wagon” when I got the privilege of driving it in high school.  My mom had just picked us up from AWANA.  There must have been a lesson or message that night that really stirred my soul.  Because growing up in a Christian family, even by the age of 8, I’m sure I had heard of my need of a Savior dozens of times before.  But, as I was riding in our car that night, I remember vividly looking up at the full moon and asking the Lord to take my sins away and inviting Him into my life.  The feeling of being washed clean came over me and I’ve never felt such joy in my life.  The natural high of knowing I was now in the family of Christ was inexplicable and incomparable to any other feeling I’ve ever had.  Christ had indeed entered my soul, and I felt the powerful presence of God.  Not only was Christ living in me, I would now live with Him in eternity. 

 

One of the most well-known verses of all, John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son that whoever believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.”  The Lord lets us make the decision to come to Him and loves us either way.  If we choose him we put our trust and confidence in him and him alone, knowing that he is the only one who can save us from eternal condemnation or eternal hell.  After that point, nothing in the world should matter except trying to live a life worthy of Christ.  No amount of money or possessions can get us to heaven, it’s only by faith that we are saved.

Twenty some years later after my decision to follow Christ, I have never looked back.  Though most days I don’t deserve his mercy and grace, I will be forever striving to be in the image of Christ.  He has seen me through the hardest times and the most wonderful times in my life.  I can say with certainty that the hard times were easier knowing I had Christ to lean on and the good times were even better knowing he was celebrating there with me.  Nothing in my life is more significant than the decision to follow Christ.

Tami Driggers

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This Week's Verse: 

Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery.  Instead, be filled with the Spirit.  Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs.  Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Ephesians 5:18-20