I recently attended a spiritual growth workshop that was excellent. Although something weird happened that took me a while to put my finger on.
As a group we practiced Lectio Divina which, in short, is a slow reading of a few verses. While reading the verses, you're looking/praying for what God has for you in them, what words or phrases jump out and why has He called that to your attention. Every time I've done this it's been profound for me.
After we were finished with that exercise, the speaker asked us if we were willing to share what God brought forth out of those verses for us individually. As we went around the room, it was amazing to me that out of 20 or so people, not one of us had the same answer. Every one of us had a different experience with God while only studying a few verses.
But, here's the weird thing, while we were sharing, one man just simply said, "that was just for me and what I got was just for me."
My first thoughts were, "good grief, don't make it weird, just share...whatever it is that you learned could be beneficial to the rest of us too." Then I thought, "hmmm....maybe that's super mature of him, now I feel stupid for sharing so freely." I then panicked a bit, "he must think the rest of us are idiots for being so willing to share our sacred moments with God!"
Well, whatever the reason for him not sharing, it just bothered me and I could not stop thinking about it.
We live in this world of social media now where we don't even hesitate before we share. We press a button and hundreds of people know if we're mad, happy, or indifferent. We want everyone to see our baby's first smile, our fabulous batch of cookies, our anger toward politicians, verses and blogs that were speaking to us....people must know our every happening and our every accomplishment. Though much of it is superficial, we flow toward this need for people to know what's going on in our lives at all times. I am not unaffected by this (the irony is not lost on me that I'm writing a blog about not sharing).
Sometimes as I'm reading the Bible I wonder who would have written autobiographies if they lived in this day and age...or who would be trending. Definitely the guy who got his ear cut off by Peter and was immediately healed by Jesus. Would Moses? He's wasn't eloquent in speech, but could probably express himself better if he was writing things down (ahem...some of us can identify). Perhaps Judas too...he would have been posting those "I can't take this anymore!" messages on Facebook that require further probing from his "friends."
Don't get me wrong, I have been greatly benefited by others sharing their spiritual ups and downs and, in general, sharing life's ups and downs. I have experienced tremendous growth because of it. Just as Proverbs says, "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." We're also repeatedly told to declare God's glory.
But could some experiences in life be meant just for us? For our pleasure, for our mourning, or for our growth?
Several times in the Bible, Jesus healed people and then told them not to tell anyone. Why? Couldn't his kingdom only be benefited by sharing the amazing miracles of Christ? Well, inevitably the people always do tell and then Jesus has to flee the premises. Someone could probably write an entire book on the reasons...probably having to do with not drawing attention to the miracle, but to the man or something along those lines. But for me it sort of begs the question, "why do we have this incessant need to tell others what's happening to us? And is it always a good thing?"
So in this day of free-for-all information, sitting in a workshop listening to someone decide not to share was almost shocking to me. And after reflecting on it, I've decided it was refreshing. It was like a cool breeze in the heat of summer....rare.
At the very least, it has prompted me to think about what God would have me share with others and what's just for me. That date we went on.....maybe that's for just me and my husband to savor....That precious snapshot of my 2 year old.....that delicious batch of cookies.....Those verses I read in the quietness of morning.....that workshop I went to.....;)
Showing posts with label My Faith. Show all posts
Showing posts with label My Faith. Show all posts
Saturday, May 10, 2014
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Gray Days
The home I grew up in had two large glass sliding doors facing the East. In the morning the sun would stream in those doors, warming the house and leaving 2 large rectangle patches of sunlight on the carpet. In the morning, when time would allow, I would lay in those spaces of sunlight, moving with them as they moved. I loved the warmth, coziness, and comfort of those patches of sun and remember feeling disappointed when the sun rose too high in the sky for them to remain. Then I would will myself to get up and move on with my day.
I am revived by the sun. It is life giving. Energy giving. I feel like when the sun is out, I am on top of the world, able to accomplish my tasks before me. I feel like the Lord is near. His face is shining upon me.
But then, there are gray days....like today. The days when the sun refuses to appear. And I feel down. I am down. The Lord feels far away. I cannot accomplish the tasks set before me. I don't want to. My attitude reflects the weather. I hear every whine. I see every speck of dust...every cheerio in the carpet. Time stands still. Ten minutes feels like ten hours. My calling of staying at home weighs heavy upon me.
As I began this rainy day, I felt very weary of what kind of day I was facing. The Lord met me in my down state with these words and they brought a patch of sunlight into my gray day. Maybe they will for you too....
"No matter what your circumstances may be, you can find Joy in My Presence. On some days Joy is generously strewn along your life-path, glistening in the sunlight. On days like that, being content is as simple as breathing the next breath or taking the next step. Other days are overcast and gloomy; you feel the strain of the journey, which seems endless. Dull gray rocks greet your gaze and cause your feet to ache. Yet Joy is still attainable. Search for it as for hidden treasure.
Begin by remembering that I have created this day; it is not a chance occurrence. Recall that I am present with you whether you sense My Presence or not. Then, start talking with Me about whatever is on your mind. Rejoice in the fact that I understand you perfectly, and I know exactly what you are experiencing. As you continue communicating with Me, your mood will gradually lighten. Awareness of My marvelous Companionship can infuse Joy into the grayest day." - Jesus Calling by Sarah Young
I am revived by the sun. It is life giving. Energy giving. I feel like when the sun is out, I am on top of the world, able to accomplish my tasks before me. I feel like the Lord is near. His face is shining upon me.
But then, there are gray days....like today. The days when the sun refuses to appear. And I feel down. I am down. The Lord feels far away. I cannot accomplish the tasks set before me. I don't want to. My attitude reflects the weather. I hear every whine. I see every speck of dust...every cheerio in the carpet. Time stands still. Ten minutes feels like ten hours. My calling of staying at home weighs heavy upon me.
As I began this rainy day, I felt very weary of what kind of day I was facing. The Lord met me in my down state with these words and they brought a patch of sunlight into my gray day. Maybe they will for you too....
"No matter what your circumstances may be, you can find Joy in My Presence. On some days Joy is generously strewn along your life-path, glistening in the sunlight. On days like that, being content is as simple as breathing the next breath or taking the next step. Other days are overcast and gloomy; you feel the strain of the journey, which seems endless. Dull gray rocks greet your gaze and cause your feet to ache. Yet Joy is still attainable. Search for it as for hidden treasure.
Begin by remembering that I have created this day; it is not a chance occurrence. Recall that I am present with you whether you sense My Presence or not. Then, start talking with Me about whatever is on your mind. Rejoice in the fact that I understand you perfectly, and I know exactly what you are experiencing. As you continue communicating with Me, your mood will gradually lighten. Awareness of My marvelous Companionship can infuse Joy into the grayest day." - Jesus Calling by Sarah Young
Thursday, August 22, 2013
It will be Okay
Today is the first day of 2nd Grade for my girl.
She's so grown up.
As I'm sure many moms are feeling today...I have a mixture of anxiety, fear, loneliness, helplessness, and a little joy too :). It's one of those days that is a good reminder who is really in control here.
And it's not me.
And Rylie's not really mine.
She's His.
As a mother, my very favorite verse is Isaiah 40:11 and today it brings me comfort.
I know the prophet Isaiah is speaking about God's love for the people of Jerusalem here, especially those (lambs) who are weak in the faith or newborn souls. But I have those very same defenseless lambs who live under my roof and this verse paints a picture of unsurpassed beauty to this mother. And I hope it does for you too.
These words bring me peace that passes all understanding. And a promise. It will be okay.
She's in great arms.
She's so grown up.
As I'm sure many moms are feeling today...I have a mixture of anxiety, fear, loneliness, helplessness, and a little joy too :). It's one of those days that is a good reminder who is really in control here.
And it's not me.
And Rylie's not really mine.
She's His.
As a mother, my very favorite verse is Isaiah 40:11 and today it brings me comfort.
He tends His flock like a shepherd:
He gathers the lambs in His arms
and carries them close to His heart;
He gently leads those that have young.
Isaiah 40:11
These words bring me peace that passes all understanding. And a promise. It will be okay.
She's in great arms.
Monday, June 10, 2013
Just Breathe
Life has gotten in the way of my blog over the past several months and to be honest, many of my days are focused on just trying to catch my breath.
Okay, Bri just dumped a bottle of shampoo on the carpet. Try not to get angry.
Just Breathe.
What? Austyn wants a snack and we just finished lunch 10 minutes ago. Try not to get annoyed.
Just Breathe.
Rylie's begging to go to the pool again, but bringing a 1 year old with to the pool isn't my idea of fun. Try not to be exhausted already.
Just Breathe.
While much of my breathing focuses on trying to get a handle on myself so I don't go off the deep end, today I read about a different breathing technique. This one is powerful...a life-changer. It's breathing in the Holy Spirit.
In his book Not a Fan, Kyle Idleman shares about a spiritual breathing exercise he learned that helps him to always keep in step with the Spirit. I love good solid advice, especially spiritually speaking, so I thought I would share his words today. (Side note: One of my pet peeves is reading a self-help type book telling you everything you should be doing without any practical advice on how to actually get it done!!) Here is Idleman's advice...
"The teaching of Bill Bright helped me learn to become a follower who is filled with the Spirit. He teaches a spiritual exercise called "Spiritual Breathing." The basic idea is that you live with a moment by moment awareness of the Spirit until walking in the Spirit becomes as natural - as habitual - as breathing. It's just part of who you are. Here's how it works; the moment you become aware of sin in your life you exhale. When you exhale, you breathe out and repent of your sin. Repentance becomes a natural response and clears out space in our hearts for the Spirit to fill us. So the moment you are prideful, jealous, lustful, harsh, selfish, impatient, you exhale and repent of your sin....
And then you inhale. When you inhale you breathe in and pray to be filled with the Spirit and you surrender control over to him. As you practice this spiritual breathing it teaches you to keep in step with the Spirit. Followers live with a continual awareness of the Spirit's presence and a constant prayer to be filled with his power."
I'm thinking if I focus on this breathing technique instead of deep breathing to cool off my temper, I might actually get somewhere :).
Okay, Bri just dumped a bottle of shampoo on the carpet. Try not to get angry.
Just Breathe.
What? Austyn wants a snack and we just finished lunch 10 minutes ago. Try not to get annoyed.
Just Breathe.
Rylie's begging to go to the pool again, but bringing a 1 year old with to the pool isn't my idea of fun. Try not to be exhausted already.
Just Breathe.
While much of my breathing focuses on trying to get a handle on myself so I don't go off the deep end, today I read about a different breathing technique. This one is powerful...a life-changer. It's breathing in the Holy Spirit.
In his book Not a Fan, Kyle Idleman shares about a spiritual breathing exercise he learned that helps him to always keep in step with the Spirit. I love good solid advice, especially spiritually speaking, so I thought I would share his words today. (Side note: One of my pet peeves is reading a self-help type book telling you everything you should be doing without any practical advice on how to actually get it done!!) Here is Idleman's advice...
"The teaching of Bill Bright helped me learn to become a follower who is filled with the Spirit. He teaches a spiritual exercise called "Spiritual Breathing." The basic idea is that you live with a moment by moment awareness of the Spirit until walking in the Spirit becomes as natural - as habitual - as breathing. It's just part of who you are. Here's how it works; the moment you become aware of sin in your life you exhale. When you exhale, you breathe out and repent of your sin. Repentance becomes a natural response and clears out space in our hearts for the Spirit to fill us. So the moment you are prideful, jealous, lustful, harsh, selfish, impatient, you exhale and repent of your sin....
And then you inhale. When you inhale you breathe in and pray to be filled with the Spirit and you surrender control over to him. As you practice this spiritual breathing it teaches you to keep in step with the Spirit. Followers live with a continual awareness of the Spirit's presence and a constant prayer to be filled with his power."
I'm thinking if I focus on this breathing technique instead of deep breathing to cool off my temper, I might actually get somewhere :).
Sunday, February 24, 2013
Something I Love
I thought I would every-so-often write about a few things that I use often or that I can't live without. Some will be frivolous while others are lasting. I'll start with one that's lasting.
For Christmas, my mom and dad got me the devotional Jesus Calling. I have come to cherish the moments that I get to sit down and soak in the words that the Lord has for me each day through this small book.
There is rarely a day when I read that I don't feel God's very voice speaking to me through it. And today was no exception.
Today is Sunday. I look forward to Sunday mornings because I get to be among friends and worship with my fellow believers. Sunday's revive me. It's a set aside time to worship the Lord and talk with others about what you're learning from him. And as a mom of young kids, to have a time carved out to do this is priceless.
Well, unfortunately we've had a lot of sickness this winter in our family. Often times I find myself sitting at home on Sundays (and many other days). And today is one of those days. Brianna is cranky and sick. I was annoyed and disappointed. And thoughts like this started to creep in...
Why am I the one who always has to stay home? I'm always home!
I always have to miss out on things because of the kids being sick.
Why do I even try to make plans!
My life sucks!
Yes, my thought life becomes a bit dramatic...So, after I got the baby down for a nap, I made a conscious decision (even though my house was a mess and I desperately wanted to clean it) to sit down and spend some time with the Lord. I opened Jesus Calling and this is what I read...
Be on guard against the pit of self-pity. When you are weary or unwell, this demonic trap is the greatest danger you face. Don't even go near the edge of the pit. Its edges crumble easily, and before you know it, you are on the way down. It is ever so much harder to get out of the pit than to keep a safe distance from it. That is why I tell you to be on guard.
...When you are occupied with praising and thanking Me, it is impossible to feel sorry for yourself. Also, the closer you live to Me, the more distance there is between you and the pit. Live in the Light of My Presence by fixing your eyes on Me. Then you will be able to run with endurance the race that is set before you, without stumbling or falling.
For Christmas, my mom and dad got me the devotional Jesus Calling. I have come to cherish the moments that I get to sit down and soak in the words that the Lord has for me each day through this small book.
There is rarely a day when I read that I don't feel God's very voice speaking to me through it. And today was no exception.
Today is Sunday. I look forward to Sunday mornings because I get to be among friends and worship with my fellow believers. Sunday's revive me. It's a set aside time to worship the Lord and talk with others about what you're learning from him. And as a mom of young kids, to have a time carved out to do this is priceless.
Well, unfortunately we've had a lot of sickness this winter in our family. Often times I find myself sitting at home on Sundays (and many other days). And today is one of those days. Brianna is cranky and sick. I was annoyed and disappointed. And thoughts like this started to creep in...
Why am I the one who always has to stay home? I'm always home!
I always have to miss out on things because of the kids being sick.
Why do I even try to make plans!
My life sucks!
Yes, my thought life becomes a bit dramatic...So, after I got the baby down for a nap, I made a conscious decision (even though my house was a mess and I desperately wanted to clean it) to sit down and spend some time with the Lord. I opened Jesus Calling and this is what I read...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Be on guard against the pit of self-pity. When you are weary or unwell, this demonic trap is the greatest danger you face. Don't even go near the edge of the pit. Its edges crumble easily, and before you know it, you are on the way down. It is ever so much harder to get out of the pit than to keep a safe distance from it. That is why I tell you to be on guard.
...When you are occupied with praising and thanking Me, it is impossible to feel sorry for yourself. Also, the closer you live to Me, the more distance there is between you and the pit. Live in the Light of My Presence by fixing your eyes on Me. Then you will be able to run with endurance the race that is set before you, without stumbling or falling.
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross...Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
Hebrews 12:1-3
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Motherhood takes endurance. Lots of it. And there are days when I am very, very weary of it. But, I want to run this race of motherhood with perseverance and without living in the pit of self-pity. I spend way too much time in that pit. The Lord has marked out this race that's set before me. I want to honor and praise him and thank Him for it, even when I think I can't run anymore.
Lord thank you for this quiet morning that I got to spend with you. I praise you that I got to rock my baby and spend time with her without interruption. Thank you that she's sleeping now. And thank you for your gentle words of reprimand that were intended to mold me and shape me into the woman you want me to be. Your woman. Help me to run this race you set before me with a thankful heart.
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Dedication Verses
A few months ago we got Bri dedicated. If you don't know what that means, it's basically getting up in front of the church and promising to raise your child for the Lord. I'm not going to lie, just thinking about getting up in front of a couple hundred people practically gives me hives. Sheesh, what we won't do for our kids, am I right?
Well, we've done this with all 3 of the girls now. And each time we've done a dedication, it feels more significant it to me.
Maybe it's because I have a few years of parenting under my belt now and I realize just how valuable it is to train my kids and teach them how to love and serve the Lord. And to promise - in front of others and the Lord - to do just that. For me, dedication has become a huge commitment....not just something I should do because that's what church people do.
As is custom in our church, for each dedication we chose some scripture to "give" to our children to guide them in life. When preparing for Brianna's dedication, I looked back at what we chose for the older girls and I just found myself being thankful we had done this. Maybe I'm just sentimental, but I love how they have a verse that's "theirs" from the time they were born. One that was prayed for them and over them. And still is.
Here's what we chose for each of our girls:
Rylie
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6
(This verse was one of our favorites and felt like if we had to pick one verse for our first child to live by in the Bible, this would be it!)
Austyn
Rejoice in the Lord always, I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:4-7
(Out of all the verses I've put to memory, the Lord brings this one to my mind most often. We thought it would be a great verse for Austyn to be able to turn to in every stage of life.)
Brianna
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them was meant to be.
Psalm 139:13-16
(We chose this for her because, as our third child, we wanted her to know she was created uniquely and wonderfully by God. Also, the Lord really laid this verse on my heart while I was pregnant with her.)
Our verse/promise to our girls from us
I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparable great power for us who believe.
Ephesians 1:16-19a
Well, we've done this with all 3 of the girls now. And each time we've done a dedication, it feels more significant it to me.
Maybe it's because I have a few years of parenting under my belt now and I realize just how valuable it is to train my kids and teach them how to love and serve the Lord. And to promise - in front of others and the Lord - to do just that. For me, dedication has become a huge commitment....not just something I should do because that's what church people do.
As is custom in our church, for each dedication we chose some scripture to "give" to our children to guide them in life. When preparing for Brianna's dedication, I looked back at what we chose for the older girls and I just found myself being thankful we had done this. Maybe I'm just sentimental, but I love how they have a verse that's "theirs" from the time they were born. One that was prayed for them and over them. And still is.
Here's what we chose for each of our girls:
Rylie
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6
(This verse was one of our favorites and felt like if we had to pick one verse for our first child to live by in the Bible, this would be it!)
Austyn
Rejoice in the Lord always, I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:4-7
(Out of all the verses I've put to memory, the Lord brings this one to my mind most often. We thought it would be a great verse for Austyn to be able to turn to in every stage of life.)
Brianna
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them was meant to be.
Psalm 139:13-16
(We chose this for her because, as our third child, we wanted her to know she was created uniquely and wonderfully by God. Also, the Lord really laid this verse on my heart while I was pregnant with her.)
Our verse/promise to our girls from us
I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparable great power for us who believe.
Ephesians 1:16-19a
Monday, January 28, 2013
FROM THE MOUNTAIN TOPS
Freedom.
That's the only word I can come up with to describe what I feel right at this very moment. Last weekend I went on a women's Encounter. Not to be confused with a "retreat" because as they said, "we're not retreating from anything." We came to have an encounter with God. And that's exactly what we did.
I can't remember feeling this completely drenched in God's love....ever.
Completely loved.
Completely whole.
Completely forgiven.
I've never before lifted my hand in praise while driving down the middle of main street. I did that today. It was an automatic, genuine, fearless sort of love I felt.
I've not felt this clean and pure inside since I gave my life to Christ 25 years ago.
I'd been holding on to a lot of "yuck" in my life. And...it's gone now. It's God's. I gave it to Him. Because he wanted it.
If I had a mountain top to shout on I would. But my blog will have to do for now.
GOD LOVES YOU SO MUCH!
HE SENT HIS SON TO DIE FOR YOUR SIN.
JESUS HAS ALREADY PAID THE PRICE.
HE PAID THE PRICE FOR YOU AND HE WANTS YOU.
ALL OF YOU.
NO MATTER WHAT YOU'VE DONE.
YOU CAN BE REDEEMED.
YOU ARE LOVED BEYOND ALL MEASURE.
OPEN YOUR HEART TO HIM.
BE WASHED CLEAN.
GIVE YOUR LIFE TO HIM AND YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED.
In fact, you'll want to shout about Him from the mountain tops!
That's the only word I can come up with to describe what I feel right at this very moment. Last weekend I went on a women's Encounter. Not to be confused with a "retreat" because as they said, "we're not retreating from anything." We came to have an encounter with God. And that's exactly what we did.
I can't remember feeling this completely drenched in God's love....ever.
Completely loved.
Completely whole.
Completely forgiven.
I've never before lifted my hand in praise while driving down the middle of main street. I did that today. It was an automatic, genuine, fearless sort of love I felt.
I've not felt this clean and pure inside since I gave my life to Christ 25 years ago.
I'd been holding on to a lot of "yuck" in my life. And...it's gone now. It's God's. I gave it to Him. Because he wanted it.
If I had a mountain top to shout on I would. But my blog will have to do for now.
GOD LOVES YOU SO MUCH!
HE SENT HIS SON TO DIE FOR YOUR SIN.
JESUS HAS ALREADY PAID THE PRICE.
HE PAID THE PRICE FOR YOU AND HE WANTS YOU.
ALL OF YOU.
NO MATTER WHAT YOU'VE DONE.
YOU CAN BE REDEEMED.
YOU ARE LOVED BEYOND ALL MEASURE.
OPEN YOUR HEART TO HIM.
BE WASHED CLEAN.
GIVE YOUR LIFE TO HIM AND YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED.
In fact, you'll want to shout about Him from the mountain tops!
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world,
but to save the world through him.
John 3:17
Sunday, January 13, 2013
She's Answered (Part 2)
Over 2 years ago I wrote this post (check it out if you haven't read it.)
With tears in my eyes and my heart overflowing, I am more happy than you'll ever know that I get to write Part 2 to this story.
**************************************************
I actually pictured the second half of this story to go way differently. I had prayed so fervently that Nat would have a baby that I had worked up a scenario in my mind that I was just sure would come true.
We would be having lunch at Pizza Hut. (It had to be Pizza Hut, because we had been "lunching" there since we met in 1997. In the early days, without fail, every time we ate there Nat would pop a quarter in the jukebox and play "Bump and Grind" by R. Kelly. We would laugh until we cried. A part of me died when they remodeled and got rid of that jukebox.) Anyway, in my scenario, we would be chatting and then Nat would casually say, "hey Tam, guess what....I'm pregnant!!!" And we would both scream and then cry and create a big scene. The waitress would come over to see if we were all right...
But, enough of my romanticism...God had a much different idea of how things would go and here's how Part 2 really happened:
We would be having lunch at Pizza Hut. (It had to be Pizza Hut, because we had been "lunching" there since we met in 1997. In the early days, without fail, every time we ate there Nat would pop a quarter in the jukebox and play "Bump and Grind" by R. Kelly. We would laugh until we cried. A part of me died when they remodeled and got rid of that jukebox.) Anyway, in my scenario, we would be chatting and then Nat would casually say, "hey Tam, guess what....I'm pregnant!!!" And we would both scream and then cry and create a big scene. The waitress would come over to see if we were all right...
But, enough of my romanticism...God had a much different idea of how things would go and here's how Part 2 really happened:
About 2 years ago, after many tears and disappointing doctor appointments, Natalie and Jerod felt the Lord calling them toward adoption. As most all families who have adopted know, this began a wild, stressful, uncertain and many times, discouraging journey for them. Several months into it, after many setbacks and disappointments, they seemed to really "catch a break."
A break that was clearly one of Divine intervention.
Jerod's uncle, who is a doctor, had a special patient one day. An aging foster care mother, who had a beautiful baby boy whom she loved but felt she wasn't in a place to raise, came into the clinic. Out of pure "chance" and completely unrelated to why she came to the doctor, she began to chat about her situation. Jerod's uncle told her Nat and Jerod's story and gave her their information.
And so began Jerod and Nat's pursuit of little Easton Dean. The situation seemed too good to be true. Easton's middle name "Dean" was even Natalie's late father's middle name! They knew this was the little boy God had for them. The child they had waited 8 years to hold. But, unfortunately, as with all things that seem too perfect, there were many barriers between them and this precious boy. The journey was not a smooth one, filled with court appearances, mounds of paperwork and all sorts of legal nonsense.
The stress of all this really took a toll on Natalie's health and I was genuinely worried for my friend. I often wondered how much a person can actually take before they get overtaken. I think Nat was on the brink of insanity, though I would never tell her this of course. "Let's think positive" is what I would try to say. (Yes, I know, friends don't get any better than me. I'm never one to come in with a great word of advice, it just eludes me.)
But, what I've been learning a lot about lately is that there are 2 stories in life. An upper story and a lower story. What we live out and can only see is the lower story. Only God can see both the upper and lower stories. Our pastor explained it well....he said it's like cross stitching. Only God can see what's on top and it looks beautiful and perfectly done. What we see is the backside or underside of a cross stitch. It looks a little messy at times, but all the while God is orchestrating something beautiful.
And, 8 years in the making, he did orchestrate something beautiful indeed.
A few days ago, on January 9th, Natalie and Jerod officially became parents to little Easton Dean. What a glorious, glorious day!
She is Answered.
 |
| Isn't he adorable?!! |
Not only so, but we rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.
And hope does not disappoint us...
And hope does not disappoint us...
Romans 5:3-5a
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Keeping in Step
So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want.
Galatians 5:16-17
Whenever I read Paul's words here I come away thinking...boy are these verses ever true. I can literally feel a war going on in my soul probably every day. My sinful nature is very alive and well. Here's a fraction of what goes through my mind on a daily basis...
I'm going to tell her she's being a jerk.
Do it.
If my child disobeys me one more time I'm going to lose it on her.
About time.
I'm going to call someone and tell them this juicy piece of news!
Oh, that someone will love to hear it.
I'm way too busy to have them over.
Yes, you are so busy.
Ugh, I need to remind/nag my husband to fix that.
Maybe if you keep doing it he'll remember!
The bummer part is, I find myself listening to this sinful side of me far to much. Sometimes I get so far into it I literally don't know the truth from the lie. When I can feel this war going on, I often find myself saying out loud, "Get thee behind me Satan!", so I can figure out what the Lord really wants of me in a certain situation.
I guess the good news is that I definitely have the POWER to overcome it. And I know the more I do overcome it the softer that sinful voice will become. It just feels as though it's center stage right now.
But hey, I'm blaming it on the baby! I totally fell out of my routine of daily reading God's word after I had her.
Oh wait, blaming? Couldn't possibly be my sinful nature...
Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.
Galatians 5:25, 26
Thursday, September 6, 2012
The Big Leagues
I've decided that having your child go to school is a lot like actually giving birth to your first child. Everyone can give you advice and prepare you mentally but until it's actually here you are oblivious. Nothing quite prepares you for that first day that they're with teachers and classmates more than they are with you.
Talk about anxiety...
Half day Kindergarten was a walk in the park, but 1st Grade? We are in the Big Leagues now.
Who knew that girl clicks started this early?
I hope she's not participating...
And who would've thought my outgoing girl would miss me so much?
Lord, please help her have fun!
Why are sight words so dang hard to memorize?
Yes, an A and a T spell AT....AT....AT!!!! Get it already!
Is it me, or is there only 10 minutes from the time they get home to the time they go to bed?
Sheesh, it's 8 o'clock and we haven't taken a bath, gone over sight words, or read books yet! I'm such a failure!
All these things and a thousand more rush through my head all day. And if I could sum up what I'm feeling most of the time, here's a word for ya...
Helpless.
This is good for me though. It's brought me to a new place, a place where all you can do is pray. So prayer is my constant companion these days. I think when she was home with me all day, I felt more in control so it lessened my desire to pray for her.
It made me realize that feeling out of control is essential to letting the Lord have control. Placing your child (or anything) in the Lord's hands? Not an easy thing to do...especially for a control freak.
I cried even. Called my sister in desperation. Brooded. Sulked. Contemplated home school. My last resort? Prayer. Then I asked a couple other people to pray. Then things began to change....huh.
The next day...
Mom, I made a friend today! It's a good thing you prayed!
The day after that...
My anxiety, gone.
The day after that...
AT...you got it! Now, how are we going to remember THIS?
The day after that...
I love school mom.
Ahhhhh....peace. Peace that transcends all understanding.
Talk about anxiety...
Half day Kindergarten was a walk in the park, but 1st Grade? We are in the Big Leagues now.
Who knew that girl clicks started this early?
I hope she's not participating...
And who would've thought my outgoing girl would miss me so much?
Lord, please help her have fun!
Why are sight words so dang hard to memorize?
Yes, an A and a T spell AT....AT....AT!!!! Get it already!
Is it me, or is there only 10 minutes from the time they get home to the time they go to bed?
Sheesh, it's 8 o'clock and we haven't taken a bath, gone over sight words, or read books yet! I'm such a failure!
All these things and a thousand more rush through my head all day. And if I could sum up what I'm feeling most of the time, here's a word for ya...
Helpless.
This is good for me though. It's brought me to a new place, a place where all you can do is pray. So prayer is my constant companion these days. I think when she was home with me all day, I felt more in control so it lessened my desire to pray for her.
It made me realize that feeling out of control is essential to letting the Lord have control. Placing your child (or anything) in the Lord's hands? Not an easy thing to do...especially for a control freak.
I cried even. Called my sister in desperation. Brooded. Sulked. Contemplated home school. My last resort? Prayer. Then I asked a couple other people to pray. Then things began to change....huh.
The next day...
Mom, I made a friend today! It's a good thing you prayed!
The day after that...
My anxiety, gone.
The day after that...
AT...you got it! Now, how are we going to remember THIS?
The day after that...
I love school mom.
Ahhhhh....peace. Peace that transcends all understanding.
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:4-7
Friday, May 4, 2012
How Do You Know?
A couple of years ago I was flipping channels to find something worth watching and landed upon a special by Bill Maher basically disproving Christianity. I was intrigued so I watched for a while until I'd had enough barbs and cynical comments at what felt like my expense that I had to shut it off. But, apparently I watched it a little too long because it did something to me. It planted a little seed of doubt. I started to question if my faith was really a real thing. It was so easily disproved by Bill Maher after all. :)
I never stopped believing, yet every once in a while I still feel the enemy whispering words of doubt into my ears about the authenticity of my faith. Then I feel completely guilty if I entertain those thoughts at all. Over the last few days I've been reading a novel that speaks often about worshipping other gods and calling upon them in times of need. And, for some reason I've found my doubts being magnified. (Don't worry the book is not condoning these practices. I haven't gone completely off the deep end.) But, my thoughts have been racing with things like this....
These people calling on other gods are having ups and downs in their lives too.
Some ups could be credited to crying out to their gods.
How is my faith any different?
Is Jesus really real?
Sheesh....even as I write this I feel horrible! Something about bringing your thoughts out in the open is very humbling.
The good news is that the Lord's voice is and always will be stronger than the little seeds of doubt the enemy is whispering into my ear.
Today I was reading John 7:16:
"My teaching is not my own. It comes from him who sent me. If anyone chooses to do God's will, he will find out whether my teaching comes from God or whether I speak on my own. He who speaks on his own does so to gain honor for himself, but he who works for the honor of the one who sent him is a man of truth; there is nothing false about him."
Guess what God's will is?
"For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day." John 6:40
"The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent." John 6:29
So what sets my faith apart from worshipping other gods? Or putting my faith in a job, or money, or family?
If we choose to do God's will, which is believe in Him, we will find out that his teaching is the truth. As my Bible commentary says,
"this enunciates a very important fact: recognizing the truth of Jesus' teaching is not dependent upon intellectual ability or formal learning, nor is it a reward for the noble search for truth. It depends, rather, upon the person's willingness to do the will of God...This means that only those who believe in Jesus will recognize the truth of his teaching. Believe, that you may know! This is not surprising, for why should God reveal truth to those who refuse to believe in his Son."
The thing is, I know my faith is real because if nothing else...I feel it. Even if I don't have all the answers and can't always express how I know.....I just know. Because I believe in the "one he has sent" and the truth in his teaching has been revealed to me in too many ways to count.
That belief will constantly be challenged in one way or another by this world we live in. Because Satan runs rampant in our everyday lives. But, praise God for his Word that we may be reminded and encouraged and built up in in Him every day.
I never stopped believing, yet every once in a while I still feel the enemy whispering words of doubt into my ears about the authenticity of my faith. Then I feel completely guilty if I entertain those thoughts at all. Over the last few days I've been reading a novel that speaks often about worshipping other gods and calling upon them in times of need. And, for some reason I've found my doubts being magnified. (Don't worry the book is not condoning these practices. I haven't gone completely off the deep end.) But, my thoughts have been racing with things like this....
These people calling on other gods are having ups and downs in their lives too.
Some ups could be credited to crying out to their gods.
How is my faith any different?
Is Jesus really real?
Sheesh....even as I write this I feel horrible! Something about bringing your thoughts out in the open is very humbling.
The good news is that the Lord's voice is and always will be stronger than the little seeds of doubt the enemy is whispering into my ear.
Today I was reading John 7:16:
"My teaching is not my own. It comes from him who sent me. If anyone chooses to do God's will, he will find out whether my teaching comes from God or whether I speak on my own. He who speaks on his own does so to gain honor for himself, but he who works for the honor of the one who sent him is a man of truth; there is nothing false about him."
Guess what God's will is?
"For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day." John 6:40
"The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent." John 6:29
So what sets my faith apart from worshipping other gods? Or putting my faith in a job, or money, or family?
If we choose to do God's will, which is believe in Him, we will find out that his teaching is the truth. As my Bible commentary says,
"this enunciates a very important fact: recognizing the truth of Jesus' teaching is not dependent upon intellectual ability or formal learning, nor is it a reward for the noble search for truth. It depends, rather, upon the person's willingness to do the will of God...This means that only those who believe in Jesus will recognize the truth of his teaching. Believe, that you may know! This is not surprising, for why should God reveal truth to those who refuse to believe in his Son."
The thing is, I know my faith is real because if nothing else...I feel it. Even if I don't have all the answers and can't always express how I know.....I just know. Because I believe in the "one he has sent" and the truth in his teaching has been revealed to me in too many ways to count.
That belief will constantly be challenged in one way or another by this world we live in. Because Satan runs rampant in our everyday lives. But, praise God for his Word that we may be reminded and encouraged and built up in in Him every day.
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Life with Three
Several people have asked me how I'm adjusting to life with 3 kids. Mainly my answer is, "It's craziness." But it's a good crazy. I'm just happy being in full family mode. I think you're so relaxed as a parent by #3 that nothing seems that stressful.
Everyone says that you're outnumbered when you have that third child. But heck, I was outnumbered when I had 2, so now I'm just in the defensive position at all times. All you can really do is laugh when things are completely out of control.
My older girls have been from another planet lately...(writing on each others butts is just the tip of the iceberg). My house is a complete wreck. Laundry is piled high. Whenever I'm running late, something like this happens to make me even later.
But, hey, life is good. I love having another little girl to smother with kisses. And to dress completely impractical for everyday. I love making her smile with my annoying baby talk. And love watching her sisters interact with her.
Most of all, I love how every cute new thing she does makes me stand in awe of the Lord. And just looking at her perfect little fingers and toes amazes me. It makes me wonder how someone can not believe in the Creator when something is so completely and wonderfully made.
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Something's Gotta Give (Continued)
A few months ago I shared how overwhelmed I was with life. I had gotten myself involved in too many things and was in complete meltdown mode.
Read here if you want a recap.
Well, a friend of mine suggested I read the book Boundaries.
I took her up on it. And I think the book was written about me and for me. Here are just a few paragraphs that hit me between the eyes:
"people with poor boundaries struggle with saying no to the control, pressure, demands, and sometimes the real needs of others. They feel that if they say no to someone, they will endanger their relationship with that person, so they passively comply but inwardly resent."
Totally me.
"if we say yes to God or anyone else when we really mean no, we move into a position of compliance. And that is the same as lying. Our lips say yes but our hearts (and often our half-hearted actions) say no."
Ouch.
"Like fear, anger signals danger....anger tells us that our boundaries have been violated. Much like a nation's radar defense system, angry feelings serve as an "early warning system," telling us we are in danger of being injured or controlled."
The anger...oh, so me.
So, after my mental breakdown I let some things go in my life. Big and little things.
And here's what I feel today:
Freedom.
Complete liberation.
I feel liberated to focus on things that I feel God calling me to do. And do them to the best of my ability.
I recently helped with a community outreach event and normally this would have stressed me to the max. I would have dreaded the time it was going to take me to pull it together, the strain it would have on my family, and the sheer amount of planning, phone calls, and brain power it would take. I would have said, "I just can't wait until it's over with." But I didn't. I actually enjoyed it, looked forward to it even.
Why?
Because it was the only thing on my plate. And, I had time to spend on it. Had time to pray about it. Felt peace about it. It was such a turn around from the way I usually feel when I'm planning something, big or little.
So, after letting almost every commitment go, I came to this conclusion: I was living my life wishing for most of it to be over.
Generally speaking, all my commitments were "good" ones, but I kept waiting for life to slow down. Constantly thinking...if I can just make it past this weekend, things will get better. If I can get just get one more volunteer for children's church I will feel more peace. Once I get my material read for Bible study and Sunday school I'll feel on top of things.
But once one thing was over, it was quickly replaced by another commitment I had made. And it turned into a vicious cycle that I wanted so badly to stop but could not. After all, what would people think if I said "no?" What would they say if I stopped coming? Stopped helping? I was way too wrapped up in what others would say if I didn't do this or that and I lost focus of what God would have me do.
Well, I'm now focused. Focued on listening to the Lord's voice for what to get involved with. I really only have one commitment outside of my family and it's one that I love and am called to. This also frees me up to do little things for others that would normally stress me out, like make a meal or watch kids in a pinch. It now brings me joy and excitement!
I'm so grateful that the Lord brought me to a place of being completely overwhelmed because it brought about change in my life that needed to happen. I sort of feel like I just cleaned house and now I can find everything that I'm looking for. And we all know how wonderful a clean house feels!
I've finally learned the value in saying "no" and what do ya know? The world will go on if I can't make it or help with it or plan it or do it. Shocking, isn't it?
Read here if you want a recap.
Well, a friend of mine suggested I read the book Boundaries.
I took her up on it. And I think the book was written about me and for me. Here are just a few paragraphs that hit me between the eyes:
"people with poor boundaries struggle with saying no to the control, pressure, demands, and sometimes the real needs of others. They feel that if they say no to someone, they will endanger their relationship with that person, so they passively comply but inwardly resent."
Totally me.
"if we say yes to God or anyone else when we really mean no, we move into a position of compliance. And that is the same as lying. Our lips say yes but our hearts (and often our half-hearted actions) say no."
Ouch.
"Like fear, anger signals danger....anger tells us that our boundaries have been violated. Much like a nation's radar defense system, angry feelings serve as an "early warning system," telling us we are in danger of being injured or controlled."
The anger...oh, so me.
So, after my mental breakdown I let some things go in my life. Big and little things.
And here's what I feel today:
Freedom.
Complete liberation.
I feel liberated to focus on things that I feel God calling me to do. And do them to the best of my ability.
I recently helped with a community outreach event and normally this would have stressed me to the max. I would have dreaded the time it was going to take me to pull it together, the strain it would have on my family, and the sheer amount of planning, phone calls, and brain power it would take. I would have said, "I just can't wait until it's over with." But I didn't. I actually enjoyed it, looked forward to it even.
Why?
Because it was the only thing on my plate. And, I had time to spend on it. Had time to pray about it. Felt peace about it. It was such a turn around from the way I usually feel when I'm planning something, big or little.
So, after letting almost every commitment go, I came to this conclusion: I was living my life wishing for most of it to be over.
Generally speaking, all my commitments were "good" ones, but I kept waiting for life to slow down. Constantly thinking...if I can just make it past this weekend, things will get better. If I can get just get one more volunteer for children's church I will feel more peace. Once I get my material read for Bible study and Sunday school I'll feel on top of things.
But once one thing was over, it was quickly replaced by another commitment I had made. And it turned into a vicious cycle that I wanted so badly to stop but could not. After all, what would people think if I said "no?" What would they say if I stopped coming? Stopped helping? I was way too wrapped up in what others would say if I didn't do this or that and I lost focus of what God would have me do.
Well, I'm now focused. Focued on listening to the Lord's voice for what to get involved with. I really only have one commitment outside of my family and it's one that I love and am called to. This also frees me up to do little things for others that would normally stress me out, like make a meal or watch kids in a pinch. It now brings me joy and excitement!
I'm so grateful that the Lord brought me to a place of being completely overwhelmed because it brought about change in my life that needed to happen. I sort of feel like I just cleaned house and now I can find everything that I'm looking for. And we all know how wonderful a clean house feels!
I've finally learned the value in saying "no" and what do ya know? The world will go on if I can't make it or help with it or plan it or do it. Shocking, isn't it?
"Each of you must give as you have made up your mind, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver."
II Corinthians 9:7
Monday, January 2, 2012
My Testimony
A few years ago in a Bible study I was involved in, we were challenged to write our testimony down on paper. I decided it was a worthwhile project because someday I want my kids to read it and know how my life as a follower of Jesus began. I wrote it out, saved it to my computer, put one in my Bible and one in my safe deposit box (so in the event of death there would be no questions about my salvation). One can never be too prepared. Although I sure hope people don't need to read it to know where I'm going when I die.
I tried to make it as interesting as I could, but couldn't help feeling a little disappointed that there was not much to tell. No major event that led me to Christ. No bad past erased, no "coming to Jesus" moment, no hell-fire and brimstone sermon that turned my life around. I remember the moment of asking Jesus to be my Savior but honestly couldn't recall a time when I never trusted him as my Savior. I grew up knowing Christ and trusting in him.
I trusted in Him and prayed for the big and little things in life. To please help me find my lost shoe, help me pass my tests, find the man of my dreams, get that job....he was just simply part of my life. My maturity in Him has grown much and keeps growing - but my relationship, it began long ago.
Until yesterday, I kind of looked at my testimony as a "boring" one. But, this sermon opened my eyes to something. The pastor said,
"we {his church} have those who are saved in the earliest point of their life, they don't ever remember not loving trusting and following Jesus Christ and the weird thing for me is that people don't like that testimony, you should LOVE that testimony. Like I am begging God that my kid's testimony isn't that he was shooting heroin in his eyeballs then ended up in prison but rather that he has a testimony that says 'I don't remember a day that I didn't love trust and follow Him.' And so you shouldn't be ashamed of your testimony you should love and delight in it if that's your testimony."
And so I do, from now on...what's boring about loving Christ your whole life?
So here's my amazing testimony (written on 1/3/2008):
Tami Driggers
I tried to make it as interesting as I could, but couldn't help feeling a little disappointed that there was not much to tell. No major event that led me to Christ. No bad past erased, no "coming to Jesus" moment, no hell-fire and brimstone sermon that turned my life around. I remember the moment of asking Jesus to be my Savior but honestly couldn't recall a time when I never trusted him as my Savior. I grew up knowing Christ and trusting in him.
I trusted in Him and prayed for the big and little things in life. To please help me find my lost shoe, help me pass my tests, find the man of my dreams, get that job....he was just simply part of my life. My maturity in Him has grown much and keeps growing - but my relationship, it began long ago.
Until yesterday, I kind of looked at my testimony as a "boring" one. But, this sermon opened my eyes to something. The pastor said,
"we {his church} have those who are saved in the earliest point of their life, they don't ever remember not loving trusting and following Jesus Christ and the weird thing for me is that people don't like that testimony, you should LOVE that testimony. Like I am begging God that my kid's testimony isn't that he was shooting heroin in his eyeballs then ended up in prison but rather that he has a testimony that says 'I don't remember a day that I didn't love trust and follow Him.' And so you shouldn't be ashamed of your testimony you should love and delight in it if that's your testimony."
And so I do, from now on...what's boring about loving Christ your whole life?
So here's my amazing testimony (written on 1/3/2008):
My
Testimony
I
will never forget the way I felt that night – the night I gave my life to the
Lord. I don’t remember my age (though
I’m guessing around eight), I don’t remember the message or activities at
AWANA, I don’t remember who was there (except for my mom). What I do recall is the single most important
decision in my life made at such a young age.
I
was riding in the back of our white family station wagon – which later became
known as the “party wagon” when I got the privilege of driving it in high
school. My mom had just picked us up
from AWANA. There must have been a
lesson or message that night that really stirred my soul. Because growing up in a Christian family,
even by the age of 8, I’m sure I had heard of my need of a Savior dozens of times
before. But, as I was riding in our car
that night, I remember vividly looking up at the full moon and asking the Lord
to take my sins away and inviting Him into my life. The feeling of being washed clean came over
me and I’ve never felt such joy in my life.
The natural high of knowing I was now in the family of Christ was
inexplicable and incomparable to any other feeling I’ve ever had. Christ had indeed entered my soul, and I felt
the powerful presence of God. Not only
was Christ living in me, I would now live with Him in eternity.
One
of the most well-known verses of all, John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the
world that he gave his one and only son that whoever believes in him will not
perish but have eternal life.” The Lord
lets us make the decision to come to Him and loves us either way. If we choose him we put our trust and
confidence in him and him alone, knowing that he is the only one who can save
us from eternal condemnation or eternal hell.
After that point, nothing in the world should matter except trying to
live a life worthy of Christ. No amount
of money or possessions can get us to heaven, it’s only by faith that we are
saved.
Twenty
some years later after my decision to follow Christ, I have never looked
back. Though most days I don’t deserve
his mercy and grace, I will be forever striving to be in the image of
Christ. He has seen me through the
hardest times and the most wonderful times in my life. I can say with certainty that the hard times
were easier knowing I had Christ to lean on and the good times were even better
knowing he was celebrating there with me.
Nothing in my life is more significant than the decision to follow
Christ.
Tami Driggers
******************************************
This Week's Verse:
Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Ephesians 5:18-20
Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Ephesians 5:18-20
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
The Difference a Choice Makes
After the busyness of the last few weeks, it feels good to just sit down and have a breather. It was a good Christmas, besides the fact that I probably put on 20 lbs. in 5 days. I Could. Not. Stop. Eating. Not a good thing to be pregnant over the holidays, but at least it gives you an excuse to go back for seconds and thirds.
This Christmas left me feeling very thankful for what the Lord's given me. Eric and I both have such awesome families. And it's just something I take for granted too often.
My grandma turned 80 over Christmas and we had a party for her.
She was so cute, she wrote a book about her life and gave it to all of us. I can't think of a more perfect gift or one that I'll cherish more.
As we sat down to eat, my uncle prayed and thanked God for how her life has had an impact on our family eternally. I've never really thought of that before but as he said it, it made me feel grateful for her in a different way.
I've always been grateful for her...
cookies
humor
comfort
personality
cooking
time
love
but I never really considered the impact that her choice to follow Christ had on the rest of us. What would life be like if she had not made that choice? Would my dad be a believer? Would my parents have even married? Would I even be here?
It's kind of one of those things that makes you realize that you never know what kind of impact your decision to follow Christ has on others. Who knew I would find myself praising the Lord today for a choice that was made over 70 years ago?
Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'
Matthew 25:34-36
This Christmas left me feeling very thankful for what the Lord's given me. Eric and I both have such awesome families. And it's just something I take for granted too often.
My grandma turned 80 over Christmas and we had a party for her.
She was so cute, she wrote a book about her life and gave it to all of us. I can't think of a more perfect gift or one that I'll cherish more.
As we sat down to eat, my uncle prayed and thanked God for how her life has had an impact on our family eternally. I've never really thought of that before but as he said it, it made me feel grateful for her in a different way.
I've always been grateful for her...
cookies
humor
comfort
personality
cooking
time
love
but I never really considered the impact that her choice to follow Christ had on the rest of us. What would life be like if she had not made that choice? Would my dad be a believer? Would my parents have even married? Would I even be here?
It's kind of one of those things that makes you realize that you never know what kind of impact your decision to follow Christ has on others. Who knew I would find myself praising the Lord today for a choice that was made over 70 years ago?
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This Week's Verse:
Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'
Matthew 25:34-36
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Meeting Blake
We got to have our friends Anna and Jarod over last night to officially meet Blake, their new son. I felt like I already knew him from reading her blog and keeping updated on her adoption process, but it still seemed surreal to have him in our home. He was totally squeezable, adorable and as active as any little boy around!
I am continually amazed at the heart of my friend. See how busy she is?
But she's so happy to have all her kids under one roof. I'm sure there will be many tough times ahead, but she was willing. Despite the unknowns of raising a down's syndrome baby and the unknowns of adoption in general she was willing to do what not many people do.
I'm actually fortunate to have a lot of people around me who have adopted or are in the process and I think that's an awesome thing. Not only for them, but for me. They kind of prompt me to ask myself, would I be this accepting? Loving?
Because of Anna and Jarod and my sister/brother-in-law, adoption is a hot topic in our house right now. Rylie recently asked, "Mom, when are we going to adopt?" Don't you just love a child-like faith? I love that it seems like the norm to her that people take others into their lives and homes without hesitation.
Adoption is commonplace in my circle of friends and family. And, what a gift!
Obviously it's a gift to the child. Not only are they brought into a loving home, but they are going to be surrounded by other kids in the community who have also been adopted.
It's a gift to the families who are adopting. At the very least, they are given a chance to grow in faith and love as they try to figure out how best to do this thing God has asked of them.
And it's a gift to those of on the outside looking in. We get to participate in the process, watch the kids grow and flourish in their new homes, and above all, ask ourselves, could I possibly do something like this? Does God want this for my life too? What way can I show love to others as unselfishly as these people have?
So, thank you to those of you who follow the Lord's leading in your lives without hesitation. Your love is abounding and it truly is a gift. May the glory and praise be to God!
I am continually amazed at the heart of my friend. See how busy she is?
But she's so happy to have all her kids under one roof. I'm sure there will be many tough times ahead, but she was willing. Despite the unknowns of raising a down's syndrome baby and the unknowns of adoption in general she was willing to do what not many people do.
I'm actually fortunate to have a lot of people around me who have adopted or are in the process and I think that's an awesome thing. Not only for them, but for me. They kind of prompt me to ask myself, would I be this accepting? Loving?
Because of Anna and Jarod and my sister/brother-in-law, adoption is a hot topic in our house right now. Rylie recently asked, "Mom, when are we going to adopt?" Don't you just love a child-like faith? I love that it seems like the norm to her that people take others into their lives and homes without hesitation.
Adoption is commonplace in my circle of friends and family. And, what a gift!
Obviously it's a gift to the child. Not only are they brought into a loving home, but they are going to be surrounded by other kids in the community who have also been adopted.
It's a gift to the families who are adopting. At the very least, they are given a chance to grow in faith and love as they try to figure out how best to do this thing God has asked of them.
And it's a gift to those of on the outside looking in. We get to participate in the process, watch the kids grow and flourish in their new homes, and above all, ask ourselves, could I possibly do something like this? Does God want this for my life too? What way can I show love to others as unselfishly as these people have?
So, thank you to those of you who follow the Lord's leading in your lives without hesitation. Your love is abounding and it truly is a gift. May the glory and praise be to God!
And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ - to the glory and praise of God.
Philippians 1:9-11
~ This week's verse
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
At Last
My friend Anna left today for the Ukraine to go get this little guy.
The one they've been waiting for, praying for, hoping for, fighting for and loving!
I would love if you would join me in praying for Anna and her husband, Jerad, this week!
Pray for:
~Jerad as he's home with their 2 girls this week while Anna and her mom travel to get Blake
~ Safe Travel
~ Ease of getting Blake's birth certificate and passport
~That Blake gets medically cleared to enter the U.S.
~ A smooth plane ride back for Blake, Anna and her mom
~ That nothing would hold them back from bringing him home
~ For their girls and their family to adjust well to having a new sibling
Blake Andrew
The one they've been waiting for, praying for, hoping for, fighting for and loving!
I would love if you would join me in praying for Anna and her husband, Jerad, this week!
Pray for:
~Jerad as he's home with their 2 girls this week while Anna and her mom travel to get Blake
~ Safe Travel
~ Ease of getting Blake's birth certificate and passport
~That Blake gets medically cleared to enter the U.S.
~ A smooth plane ride back for Blake, Anna and her mom
~ That nothing would hold them back from bringing him home
~ For their girls and their family to adjust well to having a new sibling
Go get him Anna!
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This Week's Verse:
Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.
James 1:12
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Missing Time
I remember writing this over a year ago,
"Someone once gave my friend great advice "just let life be what it is." Sounds simple, yet it's not easy at all. I just told some of my friends the other day that the main reason I don't want to have another baby is the interruption of my schedule. I can get up early have a little time before the girls wake up to workout and do devotions. If I had another baby this would be gone for at least a year."
Well, with our decision to add to our family, my fears have been realized sooner than I anticipated. My schedule is already shot to heck and I haven't even had the baby yet. Morning sickness, followed by a cold that wouldn't end, insomnia and a 5 year old who's now scared of the dark have taken care of any time or energy I ever had for working out or devotions.
I know I just simply have to be okay with this and "just let life be what it is." There's not much I can do about it. But, I miss it. I miss the feeling of balancing my Bible on one knee and my journal on the other. I miss a hot coffee in one hand and a pen in the other. I miss the quiet. I miss resting in His presence. I miss Him.
Now my day often goes by with learning my weekly memory verse and prayers on the fly as my sole sources of time spent with God. Both are often while I'm listening to an argument about who had what Barbie first, fixing something to eat, or putting in a load of laundry.
Much of my spiritual energy and motivation comes from studying Scripture and when I am unable to do that for long periods of time, I feel a little lost.
It just seems like this is the time in my life when what I need the most is so far from me that I can't see an ending. And the fact that I can't handle anything right now is not lost on me.
I just really, really, really don't like the excuse that "this is just the season of life you're in right now." I think I'm just going to have to figure out a way to worship without resting in worship. And it may just have to be in little snippets of time.
In the beauty that is God.
If you have something that works for you please share!
"Someone once gave my friend great advice "just let life be what it is." Sounds simple, yet it's not easy at all. I just told some of my friends the other day that the main reason I don't want to have another baby is the interruption of my schedule. I can get up early have a little time before the girls wake up to workout and do devotions. If I had another baby this would be gone for at least a year."
Well, with our decision to add to our family, my fears have been realized sooner than I anticipated. My schedule is already shot to heck and I haven't even had the baby yet. Morning sickness, followed by a cold that wouldn't end, insomnia and a 5 year old who's now scared of the dark have taken care of any time or energy I ever had for working out or devotions.
I know I just simply have to be okay with this and "just let life be what it is." There's not much I can do about it. But, I miss it. I miss the feeling of balancing my Bible on one knee and my journal on the other. I miss a hot coffee in one hand and a pen in the other. I miss the quiet. I miss resting in His presence. I miss Him.
Now my day often goes by with learning my weekly memory verse and prayers on the fly as my sole sources of time spent with God. Both are often while I'm listening to an argument about who had what Barbie first, fixing something to eat, or putting in a load of laundry.
Much of my spiritual energy and motivation comes from studying Scripture and when I am unable to do that for long periods of time, I feel a little lost.
It just seems like this is the time in my life when what I need the most is so far from me that I can't see an ending. And the fact that I can't handle anything right now is not lost on me.
I just really, really, really don't like the excuse that "this is just the season of life you're in right now." I think I'm just going to have to figure out a way to worship without resting in worship. And it may just have to be in little snippets of time.
In the beauty that is God.
If you have something that works for you please share!
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Get Over Yourself
A few thoughts on my verse to memorize from last week:
If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.
1 Chronicles 7:14
After Solomon finished building the temple the Lord appeared to him and gave the people of Israel instructions on how to attain forgiveness. He gave them four conditions they must follow in order to receive forgiveness for their sin. Humble themselves, pray, seek the Lord's face, and turn from their wicked ways.
I don't think the Lord made any mistakes when he listed them in that order. Why is "humble themselves" the Lord's first condition? My guess is because it's the most difficult by a mile. Once you can humble yourself, you're able to see sin for what it is and the rest of the conditions seem to be a natural progression after that.
When I think of what it means to humble one's self, all these beautiful words and phrases come to mind. Meek. A spirit of submission. Not proud or arrogant. Modest. But really, the phrase that sticks out most often is "to just get over yourself!"
When I was in college I played basketball for four years. Going into my senior year, we were about to have a coaching change. I loved our old coach and wasn't sure what to expect from our new one. I do remember being optimistic about some getting some wins on the board. Well, much to my regret, the new coach and I took an immediate dislike to one another. Turns out, I didn't like change so much. My attitude toward her got me well acquainted with the bench. And, as you can imagine, this only infuriated me more.
I'm not really a trouble-maker by nature, but I spent a lot of time in her office discussing my attitude that year. I wish I could tell you that I "just got over myself" but my attitude and bitterness consumed me for the entire season. It literally did not cross my mind that I could be part of the problem. Looking back I wish I would've had the spiritual maturity to see my sin for what it was.
I often think about how things might have turned out if I would have humbled myself and given the coach a chance. Prayed about my situation instead of complaining to friends. If I would've tried to seek the Lord's face, not do things on my own. And then finally, turn from my wicked ways. Hmmmm.....what might have happened? I think at the very least, I wouldn't look back with regrets and shame.
We so often look at the Israelites and think how obvious their sins were. It should've been easy for them to see that it was their own sin that was bringing affliction upon themselves and their land. By the time of Solomon's reign they'd had plenty of practice on how to attain forgiveness. But, all we need to do is look at our own lives and we will be able to understand that what sounds good on paper is stinking hard in real life. Until you've humbled yourself, you can't see sin when it's staring you in the face.
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This Week's Verse:
When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life."
John 8:12
Thursday, September 29, 2011
What is Most Important to You?
Eric and I were visiting a church of our friends' (miss you Stephen and Mary K!) a while back and the pastor issued a challenge that has stuck with me. He said something along these lines,
"I want you to think about what the most important thing in your life is. Something that you spend a lot of time doing or thinking about doing. Look at your pocketbook and your calendar and that will probably give you a good answer. I challenge you to ask a person close to you what they think is most important to you right now."
So naturally, I wondered what Eric would say was the most important thing in my life right now. So I asked him. (This is always a little scary to do for obvious reasons.....I tend to get a little defensive.) But, I already knew what I would say about myself, I just wanted to know if it was that obvious to others. It was.
My time.
My life absolutely revolves around my quiet times. I live for them. Ain't nobody gonna mess with my nap time or my time after the kids go to bed. I loathe phone calls, interruptions, chores, tasks, basically anything that takes away from time to do what I want to do.
So, notice I keep saying "MY time." That's exactly how I view it. But, what if I started to view it as God's time? What might I accomplish in the amount of time I have? Because it really does amount to quite a bit if I add it up.
I would love someday for someone to say that the most important thing to me is "others." But, I know I'm not there or even close to being there.
In a recent sermon in our church, Mother Teresa was quoted as saying,
This may be one of my favorite quotes. There's just such a rich truth in it. I am at the place right now where it hurts to love. It hurts because I have to give up some of my time to love. My weekends, my nap times, my evenings.
You'd probably have to put me in the crazy house if I didn't get some time to myself, but this challenge made me realize how much value I place on that time. Too much.
Yesterday in my devotions I read this verse and it spoke to me like never before,
"I want you to think about what the most important thing in your life is. Something that you spend a lot of time doing or thinking about doing. Look at your pocketbook and your calendar and that will probably give you a good answer. I challenge you to ask a person close to you what they think is most important to you right now."
So naturally, I wondered what Eric would say was the most important thing in my life right now. So I asked him. (This is always a little scary to do for obvious reasons.....I tend to get a little defensive.) But, I already knew what I would say about myself, I just wanted to know if it was that obvious to others. It was.
My time.
My life absolutely revolves around my quiet times. I live for them. Ain't nobody gonna mess with my nap time or my time after the kids go to bed. I loathe phone calls, interruptions, chores, tasks, basically anything that takes away from time to do what I want to do.
So, notice I keep saying "MY time." That's exactly how I view it. But, what if I started to view it as God's time? What might I accomplish in the amount of time I have? Because it really does amount to quite a bit if I add it up.
I would love someday for someone to say that the most important thing to me is "others." But, I know I'm not there or even close to being there.
In a recent sermon in our church, Mother Teresa was quoted as saying,
"I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love."
This may be one of my favorite quotes. There's just such a rich truth in it. I am at the place right now where it hurts to love. It hurts because I have to give up some of my time to love. My weekends, my nap times, my evenings.
You'd probably have to put me in the crazy house if I didn't get some time to myself, but this challenge made me realize how much value I place on that time. Too much.
Yesterday in my devotions I read this verse and it spoke to me like never before,
"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." John 13:34-35
So how will people know I'm a disciple of Christ? The verse doesn't say:
By how much money I give....
By selling all my possessions and giving them to the poor...
By how many people I share the gospel with...
By all the church activities I get involved in...
As the familiar song goes, "they'll know we are Christians by our love." All these things listed above can manifest themselves in love, but we really need to begin with loving. And for me that begins with giving up some "me time" and turning it into "others time." And it's gonna hurt. But, what a wasted life, to be defined as someone who values time to herself.
I want to be defined by loving others.
I want to be defined by loving others.
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